


Adult Supervision

by HyperKid



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Caleb is an irresponsible adult, Fluff, Found Family, Other, Serious self negligence, babysitting the wizard, bad adulting, drink your goddamn water, hydrate or diedrate
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:15:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23922943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HyperKid/pseuds/HyperKid
Summary: Caleb is thrilled to go on a week long sojourn to the Cobalt Soul when Beau offers. Beau is decidedly less fucking thrilled to be called two days in and told he’s worrying the library staff  because he hasn’t moved or eaten since arriving.Clearly someone’s going to have to keep an eye on him. Luckily, they have a lot of friends.
Relationships: Background PolyNein, Caleb Widogast & Beauregard Lionett, Caleb Widogast & Nott the brave, Empire sibs, Goblin Mom
Comments: 26
Kudos: 167





	1. Discovery (Beau)

**Author's Note:**

> HK: Look. Clearly I start a lot of stuff with Beau, and then it just... takes a long time to finish?   
> Mollymauk: You’ve hit a hot streak.   
> HK: I may have reorganized the WIP draw and noticed some build up...   
> Mollymauk: So now all your new stuff gets to build up for a bit while you work on the old stuff?   
> HK: ... Pretty much, yeah. Just the things that were already nearly done!   
> Mollymauk: This is why you have so many WIPs.   
> HK: You not building me a time machine is why I have so many WIPs.   
> Mollymauk: Do I look like an artificer? 
> 
> WARNINGS!! Self negligence to the point of harm 
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one and you can tell because none of the Nein ~talk about shit~ 
> 
> This fic is dedicated to Rawsey, who reviewed my “Beauleb” spoof Disaster Humans without reading it to tell me the ship was bad and would never work - aka the entire point of the fic. I’m two years late but eternally petty <3 
> 
> Sexual relationships are not the only ones worth exploring.

An impatient tapping bled slowly into Caleb’s consciousness. He tried to ignore it, eyes fixed on the tiny print in the book before him. It wasn’t really getting through. 

Caleb blinked a few times, forcing tired eyes to refocus. The words weren’t sinking in because there was a hand on the page. Glancing down he checked if it was one of his. No, they both seemed to be in his lap. 

His brows furrowed. This shouldn’t have been such a mystery, but his brain was fuzzy around the edges. Not his hand. Someone else’s. He looked slowly up the long, brown arm. 

A young woman was scowling down at him. He knew her name. Nott? No, Nott was the green one. The little green one. Beau. That might be why she looked angry. Beau was very grumpy. 

“You’ve been staring at the back of my hand for five whole minutes, Caleb.” She didn’t really sound angry. More... exasperated. Impatient. And a little bit... Caleb’s frown deepened with the effort of thought. Worried? 

“I am fine,” he mumbled essentially on autopilot, turning back to stare at the book once more. Behind him, Beau sighed again and leaned past him to close the book. 

“They told me you haven’t moved for two days. One of the monks thought you’d died.” 

“I am fine,” Caleb repeated, frowning down at the closed book. This was not right. He was supposed to be reading. Another sigh cut through his concentration, and a hand on his should spun him slowly around. 

Resisting seemed an awful lot like work. 

Beau’s face swum back into view, still frowning down at him. Caleb reached out slowly and poked a finger into her cheek. 

“You are supposed to be training,” he told her hazily. It didn’t seem to improve her temper, because she swatted his hand away. 

“I was, until someone came and told me my friend was basically catatonic. Have you eaten anything in the past two days?” 

Caleb frowned, considering the question. It didn’t seem to make any sense. 

“There is no food in the library,” he reminded her. Beau sighed again, even heavier than the last. 

“Yeah, well, you’re not a permanent fixture. I’m gonna guess you haven’t been sleeping either?” She asked sternly, giving him a quick once over. Caleb was dishevelled at the best of times, which didn’t help, but the bags under his eyes seemed more prominent than usual. 

Caleb shook his head slowly. 

“I... will not be here for long,” he explained, feeling his way through each word, “and I do not want to waste time.” 

Beau rolled her eyes and nodded to the closed book. 

“And how much reading are you getting done now? Look, we’ll stay the rest of the week, but you need to get some rest, some food, and something to drink, alright?” 

It took a minute or two for the words to sink in to Caleb, and he sat waiting patiently for them. A bemused smile spread across his face. 

“Another week?” 

“IF you remember to eat, drink, and sleep,” Beau said sharply. Caleb considered this too. 

“And if I do not?” He was sure he could get so much done with a whole week. Surely he wouldn’t need to waste the time sleeping. 

Beau’s eyes narrowed. 

“Then I’ll bring you back to the inn right now and tell Nott and Jester you’ve been abusing your body again. Jester will probably make you take a bath,” she added, a warning tone in her voice. 

Ginger brows drew down once more into a scowl at the thought. 

“I do not want to leave...” 

“Then you’re coming with me to bed,” Beau said simply, folding her arms once more. “They said you could have one of the rooms right next to the library, so you don’t have to go far. And if anyone sees you in the library in the next eight hours they’ve all been told to kick you out.” 

There didn’t seem to be a whole lot to say. 

“Five hours,” he tried hopefully. One of Beau’s eyebrows rose slowly. 

“Eight. You need it, Caleb. You’ll be lucky if you don’t sleep for a full seventeen. Nott said you’d done it before.” 

Caleb glowered down at his folded hands. Clearly Nott had betrayed him. Ratting him out to Beauregard. 

The monk’s eyes softened and she rested a hand on his shoulder. 

“You’ll feel better for the rest, Caleb. And you’ll get a lot more reading done than if you’re sat here staring blankly at the pages.” 

There didn’t seem to be much point in arguing; apparently he hadn’t noticed her hand in the way for several minutes. Still, Caleb was reluctant to leave the haven of books. 

“And we will stay here all week?” He pressed, not moving from his chair. Beau’s eyes narrowed, clearly contemplating just picking him up and carrying him away. 

“All week,” she agreed, nodding through the aisles of books towards the door. “But only if you get some fuckin’ rest.” 

Caleb stared blankly towards the door until Beau took a menacing step closer. It took an effort, but he hauled himself to his feet and took a few stumbling steps. The monk sighed softly and took one of his arms, tucking it around her shoulders. 

“I’m gonna bring you some water and you’re gonna drink it, understand?” Moving slowly but with a purpose, she guided Caleb carefully away from the hall of books. The wizard didn’t try to resist, his blank gaze scanning the shelves as they passed. 

A few words on a cover caught his eye and he paused, veering towards it. Beau tutted and yanked him back around easily. 

“No, Caleb. Water, bed, food, then books. Remember?” 

Caleb made a few weak murmurs of protest but let himself be led. He couldn’t seem to find the energy to actually reach the shelf. Which was probably why Beau was so annoyed, he supposed. He tried to find the energy to be annoyed. 

It didn’t seem worth it as Beau herded him effectively into a small sleeping nook complete with a jug and basin, pushed him to sit on the bed, and curled his fingers around a glass of water. Under her stern gaze, he sipped slowly at the water. 

Annoyed didn’t seem to be coming. It was just... nice, not to be in control. Not to be the one making the decisions anymore. He’d already been lost in clouds, but now the feeling was pleasant and floaty. The water was cool and soothing on a throat he hadn’t realised was so dry. 

Beau watched him impatiently, her arms folded and fingers drumming on one elbow until he had finished the glass. 

“Better?” She asked sharply, her voice harshened with concern. Most people grew softer. Not Beauregard. The thought dragged a lazy smile across Caleb’s lips and he nodded, his hand limp around the glass on his knee. 

“Better,” he agreed, his voice still a little raspy. Beau made a disgusted noise and refilled the glass. 

“Another,” she told him firmly, no space for question in her tone. She’d clearly been told the same before, probably several times. 

Caleb thought about arguing, but his hand had tightened around the glass of its own accord, and now that he’d had one his whole body seemed to have shrivelled and dried out. He made sure to sip the second slowly as well, not trusting his roiling stomach not to reject it if he gulped. 

Beau’s shoulders visibly settled as she watched him drink, and when he lowered the glass again the nod she gave him was almost approving. 

“You’re gonna lay down and sleep now, right?” She asked sharply and Caleb just... didn’t have the will to argue. So he nodded. 

Beau waited a moment, sighed, and tugged the glass from lax fingers and set it on the stool beside the bed. 

“I’m gonna find someone to watch you,” she grumbled, taking him by the shoulders and carefully guiding him down and around to the bed. It was hard and plain, not even as soft as the beds at the inn, but it was next to the library and better than the floor. 

His whole body felt leaden, only moving where Beauregard put him. She stared at him a long moment, groaned in exasperation, and grabbed his shoulders again to try and haul him up the bed. 

“You gotta be fucking kidding me,” she huffed, jerking him gradually up until his head hit the pillow. Caleb hummed sleepily, the changing position bringing all the exhaustion he’d ignored for the past two days. 

He didn’t have the energy to fight Beau so there didn’t seem to be much point fighting sleep. She’d just sit on him if he tried to get up, he was pretty sure. 

By the time Beau gave up trying to haul him about the bed he was completely unconscious and snoring gently. She stared at him for a few moments, trying to pretend she felt more disgust than worry. But it wasn’t like there was anyone around to watch. 

Heaving a sigh out through her nose, she tugged the blanket out from under the wizard and covered him over. Yeah, she was gonna need a run back to the inn to talk to the others. 

Caleb never shoulda gotten this bad in the first place; clearly someone needed to be keeping an eye on him. And she didn’t have long before Dairon left for the front. Not long enough to do it herself. 

But fuck it, that was what friends were for. 


	2. Recovery (Nott)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb’s first chaperone for his week at the library could only be one person; his goblin mom is very used to taking care of her boy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HK: Soooooooooo this was longer than I thought it’d be...   
> Mollymauk: Remember when you thought you’d double us up?   
> HK: Yeah, I really wasn’t thinking about the possibilities.   
> Mollymauk: Of Caleb’s issues or weird library shit?   
> HK: Now you’ll have to wait for next chapter for that! Nott tries too hard to behave to keep Caleb out of trouble.   
> Mollymauk: Fair. So when’s my turn?   
> HK: One after next. Or last. Depends how much amazing weird shit we can come up with.   
> Mollymauk: Library blowjobs?   
> HK: Now that’s going to be its own fic with a much higher rating.   
> Mollymauk: Again, fair. 
> 
> WARNINGS!! Some more Caleb Widogast™️ Patented Angst™️ 
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one but I dooooo cosplay some good Jester

Caleb woke slowly, not really sure where he was. He was... inside, the air had the definite, closed in feel of a room, but it sounded busier than he’d expect of a small inn. Although, it had been a while since they’d been to a city. 

A city. 

His eyes shot open, body jerking as he tried to sit up and failed. He was in the library! 

A small hand rested gently on his forehead, stilling him in place as he struggled to move. Nott sidled into view and he couldn’t imagine how she got in, or why she was in the library. She looked... really worried. A little bit stern. Kinda like Beauregard. 

Ah. 

Now he remembered. 

Explained the glass of water Nott pressed into his hand, her own on his brow turning to check his temperature. 

“Beauregard told me you nearly passed out,” she said quietly. The sadness and concern in his voice twisted a knife in his heart. 

Caleb managed a weak smile, taking the glass of water and pushing himself up with a low groan to drink. His tongue felt like it had been sand blasted and now that he’d got some sleep, his head was throbbing in a very familiar way. 

“I may have pushed myself a little,” he admitted quietly, taking a sip of water. A loud growl rumbled from his stomach as though to underline the word and Nott spun away quickly, snatching a plate from the tiny wooden table. 

“I brought food,” she said quickly, pressing a sandwich into his other hand and scooting her stool closer, fussing with the blanket and smoothing it down across his lap. Looking behind her, Caleb spotted a small pie, a mug of what was probably ale, and three pastries that probably came from Jester. They still ~looked~ fine? 

His stomach growled again just looking at the food and he looked back to the sandwich in his hand. Like the water, he forced himself to start slowly, taking small bites and reminding himself to chew. 

Nott watched him closely the whole time, and he felt a pang of guilt for worrying her. He really didn’t think he’d gotten all that bad... how had he not noticed? 

Well, that was an easy answer. Caleb wasn’t exactly used to taking care of himself, or giving much of a fuck about his body beyond the need to survive. Little things like hunger, thirst, or exhaustion just didn’t register when he finally got access to a trove of magical knowledge. 

He’d always been like that. 

Nothing got in the way when he was interested, searching for something he wanted. It had been considered a good thing, once. 

It was probably less good to overwork himself past the point of physical exhaustion. 

Swallowing the last bite of sandwich, Nott pressed the pie into his hands before he could even think. It pulled a smile to his face and he looked up at her. 

“How long was I out?” He asked quietly, his voice little more than a low murmur. It didn’t seem to be cracking so much today though, and he couldn’t feel the rasp anymore when he spoke. 

Nott watched him carefully until he raised the pie to his lips and nodded her satisfaction. 

“About twelve hours,” she told him once he’d started eating and Caleb had to suppress a smile. 

Which got a lot easier once the words settled in. 

“Twelve... twelve hours?” He asked hoarsely. A third of a day, gone. Wasted. An entire four hours over Beauregard’s time limit, he could have gone back to the books hours ago! 

Nott’s glare pinned him to the bed before he could even try to move. 

“Yes, and you needed it! You didn’t sleep for two days, Caleb, what were you thinking?” 

Suddenly the pie was the most fascinating thing Caleb had ever seen. 

He couldn’t... remember much of the last few days. He remembered arriving at the library, being seen to a table. Remembered hunting through the stacks, revelling in the sheer number of books and bemoaning how little time he’d have to read them all. 

He remembered all of the books, heavy, thick pages with finely scrawled text, each telling him nothing. And he remembered Beau coming to put him to bed. 

Nothing he could directly pin to that third day. 

He might not have left that chair in sixteen hours by the time she’d found him. 

Cheeks flushing in spite of himself, he took another large bite of the pie in lieu of answering. Nott frowned at him a moment longer, then sighed and sat on the bed, tucking herself up to his side. 

“Finish eating and we can go back to the library. I can sneak you in some water every now and then so you have something to drink, and some snacks, so long as you don’t spill on the books.” Caleb’s whole body physically recoiled from the very idea, and the little goblin giggled. “I’ll leave you to your reading, but at sundown I’m bringing you back to bed.” 

Frowning, Caleb looked to the window, quickly calculating against that little part of him that always knew the time. 

“But Nott... that is only another sixteen hours away...” it sounded like so little time, which was ironic when twelve had sounded like a lifetime before. Nott snorted and gave him a very unimpressed glare. 

“It’s four in the morning, Caleb, the sun hasn’t even risen yet. Surely a full day will be enough time?” She said it like it could be that simple, like every wasted second didn’t drag at his chest and tangle in his gut. 

Caleb couldn’t bring himself to explain how wrong she was, not with the memory of that worried face in front of his eyes. He never wanted to scare her like that. 

Still... it was barely any time at all, and the days were so short now that they’d passed the equinox. 

“A few more hours,” he begged, twisting enough to see her head on. She knew how much this place meant to him, how much he craved the knowledge hidden in these halls. Almost as much as she craved her own answers. “Just until ten. Then I will go to bed without complaint.” 

The goblin girl watched him for a long moment until her steely gaze softened. Probably thinking along the same lines. She patted his wrist and slipped from the bed, heading back to the table to grab a pastry. 

“Alright, but you have to take a break for dinner away from the library so you can eat properly,” she warned, and Caleb nodded obediently. He could eat fast as needed. 

Apparently she was going to keep feeding him as long as he’d let her. He couldn’t exactly complain, his stomach didn’t feel as much like an empty sack flat to his spine but he was still decidedly hungry. Finishing the pie, he took the curled, iced bun from Nott and bit into it. 

It was still fresh enough it must have come straight from the oven the night before, the bread soft and icing hardened around its coils. It tasted like honey and Harvest Close and memories he quickly squashed. Four in the morning or not, he wasn’t going to waste any longer than they needed to. 

“Can we go to the library now?” He asked, more to make her happy than because he wanted to wait another second. 

But even more than his thirst for knowledge, he hated the idea of being a burden on his companions. Part of the reason he craved more, devoured every book he came across, begged for every chance, was to keep himself from being left behind. A burden the others decided was not worth carrying. 

And honestly, it was bad enough that Beau had been right. He had no desire to encourage her by fucking the same thing up again. 

It wouldn’t hurt to let someone else take the lead for a while, since he was unlikely to remember to take care of himself. 

Nott hesitated a long moment, looking at the remaining pastries before nodding and stuffing them into her pockets. There were always monks in the libraries of the Cobalt Soul; expositors could need it at any hour, and even the regular monks had duties that could see them working well into the night. This was more early morning than late night, but the monastery was already bustling. 

The monks weren’t exactly keen on long lie ins. 

“Alright, I’ll come along too. Maybe I can find some books of my own to read.” She wasn’t much of a bookish person, but she’d always been a fast learner, and she liked to be useful. 

Liked to learn and try things out, and show off what she’d learned, even if she’d never take credit. That thought pulled a soft smile to Caleb’s lips and he nodded in return. 

“I could help you to find some, if you like?” He had a sneaking suspicion his pile from the table may have been returned by now. 

**

He was very pleasantly surprised to find that he was wrong. His scattered, crumpled and discarded notes had been cleared away and the books stacked neatly, but otherwise the table remained exactly as he’d left it. 

There were plenty of them dotted around the library, and before long Nott had a book of her own on some basic spells to look through. Caleb was pretty sure she’d be able to work most of them out herself in time, but he could help if she needed it. 

It’d probably be a nice distraction from beating his head against another suffocating historical treatise against wizards who overstepped. Who cared what happened to them afterwards? All that mattered was ~had they actually accomplished anything~? 

Overwhelmingly, the answer seemed to be no. 

He read book after book, clearing whole shelves at a time and then returning them an hour or so later. None of the monks who wandered through (checking up on him, he was certain) seemed to know what to make of it, but none got in his way. 

Caleb was itching to grab one of them and shake the answers loose, to demand access to the more dangerous books he knew were just beyond his reach. 

But to do so, he’d lose access to the library. Nothing he could hastily glean would be worth that; given time, he was sure he could prove himself trustworthy. Earning the access he needed would be easier, and more effective. 

He just wished it wasn’t so fucking slow. 

Nott was... less good at immersing herself in her studies as Caleb. 

She did well for quite a while, flicking through her spell book and then picking a few about traps, and one or two about alchemy. She had a soft, nostalgic smile on her face as she turned those pages whenever Caleb looked at her. He didn’t really want to ask; he knew how to respect her privacy. 

And before long, the sun was streaming through the high windows of the library, and the day began. Nott stepped out to grab some breakfast, and snuck Caleb back some bread and some pocket bacon, which he ate without question. Just so long as he was pretty sure no one was watching, it didn’t matter. Food was fuel, and he clearly needed it to continue his work. 

After his early breakfast, the bread and bacon was enough to leave him feeling pleasantly full as he perused. It helped ease his frustration a little without the gnawing pang of hunger, and he began to wonder just how much that had affected his second and third days of study. 

How much time had he wasted by not taking care of himself? 

**

As the day wore on, he found himself... not restless, but frustrated. Sick of tracing the works of long dead mages, none of whom seemed even close to any meaningful work with time. 

Either no one had ever attempted what he was trying to do before, or their efforts had been severe enough to be under lock and key. And Caleb Widogast knew powerful wizards; there was no chance it had never been tried. 

Sick of running into dead end after dead end, he shifted his focus to his little goblin friend. Transmutation was his specialty, and at least these circles and symbols made perfect sense to him. They flowed across raw nerves as a comforting balm after so long butting his head against a wall. 

Yes, he knew of Polymorph, of changing the body for an hour into something else. But that was for creature transformations more than humanoids, and he needed something more permanent. Something that couldn’t be undone if they happened to come across a dispelling artefact. Something Nott could be safe with. 

His mind felt clear and sharp for the first time in days, and he accepted Nott’s offerings of snacks pushed between his fingers without complaint. She was... a little more restless, the books only holding her attention for a few hours before she got twitchy. 

Seeing what he was working on helped to settle her a little and she did her best to help. Mostly by perusing the shelves for him while he read, looking for particular authors, or key words, or anything he asked for. She made a reasonable research assistant and he couldn’t help being proud when he glanced up from his work to see her diligently practicing the spells he’d taught her. 

Unfortunately, it seemed the damage he’d done to his body couldn’t be fully restored by one night’s sleep and a few meals. Caleb felt better, certainly, but it only took a few hours for a headache to begin to throb behind his eyes. 

By noon it had built to a heavy weight inside his skull. He had to push away a few texts because the script was just so... small, so crabbed that it hurt to look at it. Physical pain wasn’t exactly new to him, but Caleb loathed these kinds of headaches in particular because he couldn’t just push through it; his eyes unfocused despite his best efforts and the pounding in his ears made his head spin as well as throb. 

Nott must have noticed, either from his white knuckles or the way he kept tugging uselessly at his hair, trying to pull its weight from his aching scalp. A few minutes later, a glass of water was pushed discretely into his hand. 

Caleb started and nearly dropped it, glancing around quickly for any watching monks. 

“Why is this here?” He hissed under his breath, not wanting to draw any attention. Food he didn’t mind, but he couldn’t stuff a glass of water into a pocket if someone came past. 

Nott rolled her eyes and hopped into her seat beside him and kicked out her legs. 

“You’re still dehydrated. It’ll help with the headache.” 

For a moment he considered denying he even had a headache. Could see a whole argument splaying out before them, where he played dumb, and she didn’t believe him, and they argued until someone came by and saw the water and kicked them both out. 

Fuck that. 

He chugged the glass as fast as he could and shoved it back at her, looking around warily and ignoring his lurching stomach. Not exactly impressed, Nott stowed it about her person and turned back to the buttons she was organizing on the table. They’d been in the library for nearly eight hours and it was beginning to grate on her. 

Neither were exactly expecting Beau to show up around lunch but the monk had never let things like that stop her. She stood, arms folded, and scowled at Caleb. 

“Grab a book.” 

The wizard started and turned to face her, a puzzled frown on his face. 

“Are we being asked to leave?” He asked quietly, gaze darting around for anyone who might be objecting to his presence. Well, more accurately probably Nott’s, but it amounted to the same thing. 

He’d leave if she did. 

And fucking hate it. 

Beau rolled her eyes and prodded at one of his chair legs with her foot. 

“No. You’re gonna come for a walk with me around the monastery, and I figured you wouldn’t want to waste the time,” she told him bluntly, looking more like she wanted his lunch money than to help. 

Brow furrowing, Caleb shifted in his chair until he was facing her head on. 

“What do you mean? Why would I do that?” Even as he turned his back cracked and Beau’s eyebrow rose. 

“Do I need to answer?” She asked pointedly, and Caleb frowned. 

Considered arguing. 

He had so much work to do, so much to read, and he only had the rest of the week to do it in. The library was vast and he could have spent years in this one alone, studying and researching. He couldn’t afford to waste a second. 

Which was why she’d said to bring a book. 

Hesitating a moment longer, Caleb slowly became aware of the lingering aches in his legs and back. Every muscle felt stiff and creaky for being hunched over for so long, barely moving except to flip a page. Now that he was fucking thinking about it it was seeping into his mind at every level and he couldn’t help resenting Beau. 

His back felt like a hot ball of lead had nestled right into his rib cage above the spine, dragging the rest of him down. Straightening automatically to try and shift the weight only made him more aware of it and he grimaced, rolling his shoulders as if to scratch the spot. 

Beau’s eyebrow rose even higher and his shoulders slumped. 

“You will let me read?” He asked resignedly, already reaching for his current tome. 

Satisfied by his compliance, Beau nodded and patted her own shoulder. Right where he rested his hand when looking through Frumpkin. 

“Yup. Just like when you’re doin’ that magic telepathy shit. I’ll make sure you don’t walk into anything but you’ve gotta move.” 

Caleb considered asking how the fuck she’d know, or when the last time was that she’d spent more than an hour pouring over books. He doubted it’d happened a day in her life. 

But being antagonistic wouldn’t make her go away or leave him alone; it was pretty much her stock in trade. She was always very happy to respond to aggression with more aggression. And she’d probably count beating him up as getting him moving. 

Grumbling in Zemnian Caleb hauled himself up, pulling the book with him and hissing through his teeth as his legs ached. It wasn’t exactly exhaustion anymore, he wasn’t tired, it just burned like every muscle was winched too tight. Yeah, alright, he was familiar with the sensation, and he knew the only thing that would help would be to move. That didn’t mean he didn’t resent the intrusion. 

This pain he could ignore for weeks. 

Easily. 

But he’d lost so much time already that he didn’t want to lose more arguing with Beauregard. Didn’t want to tempt her to rescind his access to the library. 

When he thought of it like that, it was easier to settle a hand on her shoulder, holding his book open with one hand. It wasn’t part of their original deal, sure. But she needed to know he wouldn’t be too damaged at the end of the week to be of use. 

He could understand that. It was bad enough already that his own fire could render him useless and insensible. 

Beau waited a moment and he frowned up at her from his book. 

“Well?” He prompted impatiently. It wouldn’t be easy to pay attention and walk, but he’d done it. Losing his hand would be more of an annoyance since he couldn’t turn the pages. 

But Beau was looking thoughtful, a slight frown on her face as she considered him. 

“What if you leave the book, and read it through Frumpkin while we walk? You’re still all hunched to shit,” she explained when he looked visibly confused. 

Well. 

She had a point. 

Caleb considered it a moment, the hot lead clinging to his spine adding its own vehemence to the question. It wasn’t like he’d not walked with his mind in Frumpkin’s eyes before, a lot more often than he’d tried the same thing just reading. And Frumpkin could turn pages. 

Setting the book back down, he nodded brusquely and ordered his familiar up onto the table in front of it. Frumpkin went obediently with a gentle mew, sitting primly and focusing his gaze on the pages for his master. 

Caleb surveyed the set up for a moment, nodded, turned back to Beauregard. She looked decidedly pleased with herself, but not in a smug way. Like she was pleased to have made a contribution, to have her ideas listened to. 

He couldn’t help but smile at that, settling his hand back on her shoulder. 

She was so... young. 

He’d been like that once. 

Being the older figure whose approval was craved was fucking weird. In a hurry to shake off the feeling, he still gave her shoulder a quick squeeze. 

No need to let his own issues lessen the approval she’d earned. 

“That is a good idea. Shall we go?” 

The monk inflated under his touch, a grin spreading across her face as she nodded back, turning to lead him away from the library. 

“Yeah. We’ll do a couple laps and then come back and you can read or whatever.” 

“And you can get back to your training or whatever,” Caleb echoed back, a grin of his own trailing across his lips. 

Not that he would ever say it, but Beau was fucking adorable when she felt good about herself. 

** 

After their walk, Beau had directed Caleb to a table, pushing the glass into his hand and guiding him to take a drink of water before returning him to the library. He was a little clumsy, but hell, the possibilities were making his head spin as he settled back at the table. 

He’d finished three books from his stack during the walk, and hadn’t started the fourth only because Frumpkin couldn’t get the heavy cover open. 

Even if he had to leave the library to eat, he could keep reading. He could just leave the books open, one by one, and his clever cat could turn the pages for him and he didn’t have to stop. Privately he considered having Frumpkin sneak back after he’d been escorted to bed, maybe to read through the night, but... well, Beau hadn’t been wrong to practically drag him from the library. 

He needed to sleep. 

He didn’t need to like it. 

As they returned, Beau caught one of the monks working the library and explained the situation to them. Nott had been guarding the table while they went, but apparently this was going to be a daily thing for the rest of the time he was there, so it may as well be official. 

Frumpkin was to be allowed to sit on the table, and to turn the pages gently with his paws so long as not one single scratch appeared on the paper. Caleb’s deep offence at the idea seemed to go a long way to reassuring the library staff and that was that. 

He could read through Frumpkin any time his measly body dragged him from the halls. 

Pausing only to get the fourth book open, ready, and fuss his wonderful cat, Caleb promptly took advantage again to find a bathroom. Another inconvenient ache that he could ignore for hours, but hell. Since he could read at the same time, he may as well relish in the newfound gift. 

And alright, he probably should have gone back into his own eyes to shake and clean himself up, but fuck it. His clothes were filthy anyway after their latest sewer excursion, and likely would be until another visit to Pumat Sol’s. 

He should probably get the firbolg some kind of gift as an apology. 

But that could wait until he no longer had a library to explore and new knowledge to uncover. Even the short walk with Beau had helped to refresh him, stretching muscles and working out a little of the ache so that as he settled back into his chair, he couldn’t stop smiling. 

Nott crept a little closer in her own chair, a hesitant smile on her face as she watched him. 

“That went well?” She asked cautiously, eyes tracking his face for any sign of pain or disapproval. 

Caleb gave her a beaming smile back, taking up his book again. 

“It worked wonderfully. And Beauregard brought me to get some more water, so I have had a drink.” He almost laughed with how visibly she settled, a more certain smile spreading across her face. It was probably just his good mood, but he felt almost as good as he had on the first day he’d arrived at the library, full of possibilities. 

The rest of the day passed in a similar fashion to the morning, dividing his attention between his own research on time and Nott’s spellwork and quest for alchemy. His little goblin friend did her best not to distract him, but when he’d caught her struggling with a spell a couple of times he set aside his own books to help. 

It was less of a problem than she clearly believed, honestly. Just like the morning, his renewed research into time travel was getting him precisely nowhere. He’d scoured records from the Age of Arcanum and nothing even came close. 

He couldn’t even tell if anyone on the continent had considered it, much less the rest of the world! Zadash, which had seemed so large when they first arrived, grew smaller by the minute as he searched fruitlessly for any scraps. 

Taking some time to practice low level spells and cantrips with his clever, endearing pupil was much more satisfying. He even brought Frumpkin with him to dinner and they spent the meal in happy conversation. 

TheY didn’t go far, but Nott had noticed a few small food stalls surrounding the monastery and before long both were tucking into a hot, spiced meat pie to discuss the day. 

Nott was doing her best to behave in the library, not wanting to cause him any trouble, but being confined to one place for so long was clearly gnawing away at her. She could sit happily over the books for several hours, easily more than Beau had managed before audible and visible boredom set in. But a full day of wizardly study was still beyond her and Caleb really couldn’t complain. 

He wasn’t too surprised when she told him she couldn’t come back tomorrow; the Nein all had their own shit to do in their down time, and he hadn’t been expecting to impinge on anyone but Beauregard. But he was a little surprised to hear that Jester would be by the next day instead. 

If forced to rank his companions from longest to shortest library attention spans, he’d have ranked Jester down below Beauregard. The bubbly tiefling just... didn’t do quiet well. 

They must have been more worried than he’d thought by how Beau had found him, he acknowledged with a wry smile. He didn’t think he’d gotten all that bad himself but he wasn’t about to argue the matter; he rather suspected that after the condition he’d been in, he didn’t have a leg to stand on. 

Privately he hoped that Jester might get bored and wander off where Nott hadn’t, and he’d be able to get away with a full day’s research. Eighteen to twenty hours of uninterrupted time would be a blessing even if he did suspect Beau might come by for another walk at lunch. 

**

The evening passed quietly and even less productively than the afternoon. Caleb had a nasty suspicion that he’d already found the most useful information he’d get from the Age of Arcanum, but he just couldn’t let it go. 

It was the pinnacle of wizardry. The time when magical exploration was at its highest, when mortals had worked spells to even rival the gods! There ~couldn’t~ be nothing there! 

But as he poured over dusty manuscript after dusty manuscript, all that seemed to be there was more drudgery. Transmutation, illusion, evocation, all the other schools had reached incredible peaks and some of the most powerful spells to this day had been created. Hells, he’d found a few things that would probably be very helpful in his research for Nott, but even finding that chafed him. 

It simply wasn’t possible that no other wizards had meddled with time. It just couldn’t be true. 

Even if they all died horribly in the process, they must have had time to document ~something~. Some scrap of a notebook, some sliver of parchment, anything he could use to even begin his work. 

But there was nothing. 

Round denouncements of the wizards of the time, of their arrogance and hubris, of the terrible fates that befell most of them in the calamity. Tired moralising texts about “what mortals were permitted to know”. 

Caleb didn’t give a fuck what he was “permitted to know”. Other people controlling what he knew had led to the worst mistake of his life, and he couldn’t stand it. He skimmed the books faster and faster, searching for even the faintest hint and discarding each book a little harder than the last. 

When Nott finally slipped a hand into his, pulling him gently from the table, he went immediately to shake her off. The books were hiding the answers from him, and he ~would not~ let them win. But with a strength he hadn’t realised she tugged more firmly back and he couldn’t pull away. 

“You said you’d come to bed, Caleb,” she reminded him sharply, sounding so much like his mother that it cut the angry retort from his lips. 

Instead he deflated, all of the anger and frustration blowing out of him and leaving him feeling hollow. Numb. Empty. 

He might as well fucking sleep. He wasn’t getting anywhere. 

If Nott was relieved not to have to fetch Beauregard to put him to bed again, Caleb chose not to see it. Just let her pull him away from his table, back and around to the little room Beau had arranged for him just beside. He didn’t bother to undress, just dropped down into the bed with a hollow thud. 

Nott pulled the blanket from beneath him and tucked him in, and Caleb felt like the most ungrateful coward. She had done nothing to upset him, nothing to deserve a miserable day spent trapped by his side. Locked up in a library because he couldn’t be trusted to take care of himself. 

Knowing that if she hadn’t, he’d have undoubtedly run himself into the ground again only made him feel worse. As she turned to go, he caught her hand quickly, trying to convey just how sorry he was. How grateful he was, even if he didn’t seem to be. 

“Nott... thank you. For being here today, and... for always taking care of me.” He couldn’t bring himself to say the words, to apologise for being such a useless, embarrassing wreck of a man. She trusted him to help her, needed him to be better, to be more than this, and he couldn’t even be trusted to eat. 

But she didn’t tell him off. Didn’t rail at him for being a failure and a coward. She covered his hand with hers, a soft smile on her face as she turned back to give him her full attention. 

As if he deserved it. 

“You’re welcome, Caleb. It’s what we do, right? We take care of each other,” she told him gently, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. 

Cursing himself every way for being the worst kind of coward, Caleb managed a gentle smile for her in return and squeezed back. 

“Ja... we do.” 

“The library won’t let you back in for another eight hours,” Nott reminded him with a twinkle in her eye, smile spreading up to a grin as she leaned up on her tiptoes to press a chaste kiss to his temple, “so you may as well sleep as much as you can. Jester might not be here when you wake up but she’ll come by in the morning, once she’s out of bed.” 

From what Caleb had seen, their cleric had been blissfully taking advantage of having a bed again to sleep in as long as the morning would let her. His smile became a little less forced, a little more real, as he tried to imagine what that would be like. 

Then again, Jester had enough nightly activities that she probably needed the rest. 

Entirely unwilling to explain his sudden blush to Nott, Caleb tugged his blankets up over his head and burrowed in to sleep. If she chuckled as she called her goodnight, he pretended not to notice that either. 

He was not going to discuss his sex life with his dearest friend. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HK: Next chapter will probably be a while longer because it’s Widojest week and I actually know about it in advance! So I’m gonna have a whole party in the tag


	3. Restoration (Jester)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Jester looking after him, they almost need a third chaperone to keep her out of trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HK: One more down! Next is Fjord, and I’ve been looking forward to his chapter the most!   
> Mollymauk: Isn’t that what got you through the Avantika arc?   
> HK: Kinda more through the end of the Uk’otoa arc, yeah. Too mad to write Fjord.   
> Mollymauk: *looks pointedly at twitter* You’re not now?   
> HK: I mean right now I’m mad at Beau but she’s just always fun to write no matter what.   
> Mollymauk: Well far be it from me to ruin your fun!   
> HK: Isn’t that usually your job?   
> Mollymauk: You don’t pay me enough for it to be more than a vocation. 
> 
> WARNINGS!! Caleb is a self loathing and angsty perv, Jester is a happy and bouncy perv 
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one and everyone else in the whole wide world has their Molly figure before me and I’m definitely not just being dramatic!

Caleb wasn’t exactly expecting to wake up wrapped around a tiefling, but it also wasn’t exactly a shock. He was a little more surprised that he hadn’t woken up when Jester climbed into bed with him. 

Waking was still a slow process, his whole body feeling heavy and drained, but less sore than the previous morning. That may have had to do with the warm body pressed to his, arm and leg tossed across his chest and tail wrapped firmly around one leg. A small smile spread across his face and he slipped an arm around Jester’s waist to squeeze gently. 

Glancing out the window, he frowned suddenly. The sun was up. It was almost nine o’clock already. 

His grip tightened and Jester groaned, pushing her face into the side of his neck. 

“Five more minutes,” she grumbled, her own arm tightening around his shoulders to tug him closer. Knowing he couldn’t break her grip if he tried, he pulled back anyway, reaching up gently to disentangle himself. 

“I need to get up, Jester,” he told her in a low voice, resentment settling in his gut like a stone. 

Not with her. Never with her, even when she did something tactless or said the wrong thing. No, Caleb Widogast saved all of his resentment solely for himself. 

He had so little time left in this library, and he kept wasting it by sleeping! 

Jester grumbled something else but let him go, pushing herself up on one elbow and yawning widely. 

“What do you need to get up for?” She asked with a sulky pout, one hand scrubbing sleep from her eyes. Caleb couldn’t help pausing to smile just a little. 

Both tieflings were so fucking cute when they were tired. 

“I need to get to the library,” he told her quietly, already pushing back the sheets, “I need to go and read.” 

Jester yawned again and stretched, arching her back and stretching her arms as high as she could until her spine popped loudly. 

“Okay,” she sighed and sat up, nodding to the small table, “I brought you some breakfast things.” 

There was indeed a small basket on the table and Caleb hesitated a moment. 

Well. 

He couldn’t eat in the library. But he could stuff something in his face on the way if it meant more time with the books. 

He was entirely unsurprised to find that the small basket was filled with what looked like one of every kind of pastry the Pentamarket sold, but a little surprised that most past the top layer were still a little warm. Taking one at random, he turned back to Jester, still sat on the bed. 

“When did you get here?” He couldn’t exactly be angry with her for not waking him. He’d never asked her to, and she was there to stop him from pushing himself. Whether he liked it or not. 

Jester shrugged, still twisting cracks from her spine before rolling gracefully to her feet. 

“Like, before sunrise. Nott said you might wanna get started early so I went to get breakfast but then you were still asleep so I figured I could get some more sleep too.” A wrist pressed delicately to her mouth she yawned widely, then bestowed a beaming smile and a kiss to Caleb’s cheek as she passed him to get a pastry. 

She didn’t seem to put any more thought into it than he had, making a pleased noise at the first she grabbed and taking a massive bite. Watching her, Caleb couldn’t help a small smile as he took a bite of his own pastry. The more he watched her, the more he realised he wasn’t actually annoyed. 

The panic was still there, the sense of time passing without him, how little time he really had, but... he couldn’t push that off on Jester. 

Beauregard, certainly, and it was her damn fault he was being kicked out of the library every night, but Jester... she was so sunshine bright, sweet and earnest and so happy to see him. Being angry at her would be like kicking a cat. 

Unthinkable. 

Even with it in his mouth, he wasn’t sure what the hell he was eating, so he took a moment to glance down at the pastry. It looked like a twisted braid of dough, dotted with currants and of course dripping with icing. It tasted mostly of sugar, so he took another bite and managed a smile. 

“Thank you,” he said quietly, and Jester grinned brighter, looping an arm through his and spinning him to face the door. 

“Hey, it’s okay! Beau explained, you gotta have someone to remind you that you’ve got an actual body that needs to poop and eat and stuff! You just worry about your books, okay?” 

Which did actually remind Caleb of something and he paused, pulling her to a stop. And then he didn’t know how to ask. 

“I... ah... when... Beauregard...” he could feel the blush rising as he stammered like an idiot, but he just couldn’t think of a way to ask. How did you admit you’d neglected your body to the point where you needed a healing spell? Was there even a healing spell that covered acts of dumbass? 

Jester was watching him, her head cocked to the side curiously as she tried to working out what he was talking about. Fuck, if she could, more power to her because he wasn’t having any luck. 

Fortunately, context did provide some clues. There were some things you only asked a cleric for. 

Brightening she leaned in, one hand already moving to the symbol of the Traveler at her belt. 

“Caleb, do you need a spell? Like a Cure Wounds or a Lesser Restoration? Beau said you looked like crap but I figured you would know if you needed something,” she added cheerfully, which was fucking ironic given why she was even there at all, but Caleb latched onto it gratefully. 

“I am not really sure which,” he admitted as his gaze moved to her hand, “but I have been...” nope. 

He was not going to tell Jester Lavorre he was stiff. 

“Aching,” he substituted quickly, eyes snapping back to her face to see if she caught the momentary hesitation. If she did, she let him get away with it, her lips pursing into a thoughtful pout. 

“I don’t think a Cure Wounds will help if you’re just sore, but we can try the Restoration?” She offered, her gaze tracking along his body critically as her fingers stroked the familiar lines of her symbol. 

“It’s worth a try,” he agreed, shoulders settling a little with relief at the warm wash of magic a moment later. It could have just be knowing that there had been a spell, but he did feel better. A little more alert, with a few less cobwebs in the corners of his eyes. 

Jester stepped back, hand still raised for another just in case. 

“Better?” She asked with a hopeful smile. Caleb smiled back and offered her his hand. 

“Much better, thank you Jester. Though I don’t know what Beauregard expects you to do while I’m in the library.” 

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Jester said cheerfully, taking his hand and waving her free one dismissively, “I’m good at entertaining myself.” 

Which sent a thrill of fear through Caleb. 

** 

Honestly, Jester in the library hadn’t turned out quite as badly as he’d expected. For the most part she’d sat quietly at the table, bent over a book of her own either reading or defacing the margins. It wasn’t obvious enough to cover the actual text and frankly... she wasn’t the first. 

Caleb had found dozens of history books with graffiti of one kind or another, often in the same hand that wrote the text. He’d actually gotten some quite productive studying done, finding another vein of potential information for his studies in time. 

All in all, he felt a lot more optimistic about his chances than he had the day before. 

And then he’d looked up, and Jester wasn’t at the table anymore. 

Or anywhere in sight. 

Loathe to give up his sorely limited study time, Caleb gave Frumpkin a gentle nudge and sent the cat off to try and find her. He did his best to focus, pouring over an old and dusty manuscript for any more details, any hints where he might find more information about a wizard named Halasz. As the seconds ticked on though, he kept getting distracted. 

He couldn’t hear anything. Jester wasn’t flitting about the nearby shelves, reordering the books. Reordering the shelves themselves given half a chance, knowing her. 

On the one hand, she wasn’t doing anything loud and disruptive enough to get them thrown out. On the other, a quiet Jester was always up to something. 

Occasionally it was peaceful. She might have been drawing, or gotten really into a book. She might have found a hidden corner to paint. 

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Caleb was dying to see what she’d gotten up to. The stories of her adventures were always a good time and more than once he’d wanted to join. There was a streak of mischief in him a mile wide, and the chance to just... be part of some merry, harmless chaos was appealing. 

When he didn’t have access to books. 

A book in hand usually commanded all attention. But these books were frustrating him, trailing off into vague allusions or side tracking into another pointless war right when he felt he was finally getting to the bottom of something. 

Skimming through his pile Caleb finally pushed back from the table with a disgruntled sigh, ready to dive back into the shelves and find more. Maybe he’d bump into Jester and learn what she was doing. 

He sort if doubted it; most of the age of arcanum shelves were dusty from disuse and most of the books were brick thick and boring. A word he’d never thought he’d apply to books on magic, really. 

It was probably latent frustration. 

Staring at those old, dusty books, he changed his mind abruptly and wandered away to the section on transmutation. Another break could only help and he did need to find more information to help Nott anyway. 

Carefully balancing a stack of books taller than his head, Caleb made his way back to his small table. He’d need to take notes in his own books again, if he actually found anything useful, so he’d probably need more ink. Normal ink would do for this though; he wasn’t copying spells. 

There actually being a spell that could do what Nott needed would be far too convenient to hope for. For a moment he wondered if Jester would mind running out for ink for him. 

That’d involve finding her again though. Sighing softly to himself, Caleb set out his latest pile and hesitated a moment over where to start. He had a few ideas around the components for Polymorph, but there were definitely several missing pieces for a more permanent solution. 

He couldn’t help wondering if there might be something in the other schools of magic that would also help. He also had a feeling that he was stalling; looking at too many options to choose a single path to follow. Resolving himself to just do something, he grabbed a book at random and cracked it open. 

It was part of the joy of having access to a library again - an agony of indecision. There was no way he could read every book there in the time he had, and every book he chose meant that he wasn’t reading one which could contain the answer. It was deeply frustrating, but the only thing he could do about it was press on. 

The next time he looked up, he was a little surprised to see Jester on the other side of the table, apparently quietly ensconced in a book. Frumpkin was draped around her neck like a scarf, batting occasionally at her tail as it tickled past his nose. Traitor. 

Caleb hadn’t heard her return, but she looked like she’d been sat there a while, peacefully reading. A noise from somewhere near the ceiling caught his attention and instant suspicion shot through him. 

Looking slowly up, he caught sight of another Jester precariously balanced almost at ceiling level, working her way carefully up one of the pillars. As expected, there was a Frumpkin curled around her neck. 

The urge to toss a pencil through what he was sure was the Duplicate was nearly irresistible. And he couldn’t even ask what she was doing- no. He could. 

Sliding a hand into his pocket for his silver wire, he looked back down at his book, trying and failing to keep a smile from his face. A single finger was enough to point at the dangling tiefling, and he disguised the motion brushing both hands through his hair. 

“Jester, what are you doing?” He murmured almost without a sound, rubbing a hand across his mouth. There was no way to get the smile off his face. 

The reply was almost immediate, almost as quiet as his had been, and just a little strained. 

“Nothing! You just keep reading.” 

It was almost completely silent in the library, just enough for him to hear a faint grunt of exertion. Looking up too often could attract some unwanted attention that Jester had somehow managed to avoid so far. 

Hesitating a moment, Caleb closed his eyes. A quick peak through Frumpkin couldn’t hurt... 

The sudden upside down view of himself almost made him nauseous and he jerked without meaning to, both hands slamming into the table as Jester swung above him. Frumpkin gripped tighter as well, claws digging into her cloak as she reached for a new handhold, hauling herself to the roof. 

Steepling his fingers in front of him, Caleb hid his smile behind them and pointed one to the roof. 

“Why are you climbing the ceiling?” 

“I’m going to ambush Beau,” Jester whispered back, searching for a suitable bracing point. 

Caleb pressed his lips together, trying not to laugh. If their monk friend kept her word, she would likely be by soon to drag him away for a walk and some food. Apparently someone had also told Jester, and she had her own ideas about what to do with this information. 

It was difficult to focus on his books with the very faint sounds of Jester overhead, always keeping an ear out for Beau’s arrival. He got through another mostly because there wasn’t anything useful in it, which allowed him to skip through whole sections, but the second had some interesting areas that he kept being distracted from. 

He was almost more attentive to the outside world than he’d ever been with a book in his hands. Enough so that he actually heard her approaching, though he didn’t look up. 

It wouldn’t do to give the game away. 

As expected, a hand landed on his shoulder roughly enough to jostle him, but not hard enough to hurt. Something he couldn’t ignore. Keeping a straight face as he turned was unexpectedly hard but luckily didn’t last long; Beau was just looking across at the duplicate when Jester pounced, diving from the ceiling to tackle her to the ground. 

Beau’s startled squawk and the loud thump as they fell silenced all the usual small noises of the library. Footsteps began quickly heading in their direction and Caleb allowed himself a little chuckle. 

“Surprise!” The tiefling whispered delightedly, both arms wrapped tight around the monk’s neck. 

“The hell, Jester!” Beau hissed back, shoving the giggling tiefling off and rising, jerking her sash straight. Utterly unrepentant, Jester bounced to her feet as well and shot Caleb an ecstatic grin. 

“That was really fun,” she admitted happily. A broader, more genuine smile tugged at the corners of Caleb’s mouth and he shook his head fondly. 

“I did not put her up to it,” he told Beau quietly, both hands raised in case of a blow. The monk gave him a long stare for a moment and shook her head. 

“You’re still wiped out if you think Jess needs putting up to anything,” she said decisively, linking her arm through his and frowning up at him. “Is Frumpkin gonna stay here again while we go eat?” 

Caleb had actually opened his mouth to say yes by the time his brain caught up. Felt the smile on his face and wondered how long it had been since he properly smiled. He still couldn’t remember much of the week since his first day, just the scent of paper, frustration, and the occasional flash of triumph. 

It surprised Beau almost as much as it surprised him to shake his head. 

“I am hitting a dead end,” he admitted, glancing back at his book with a frown. He ~knew~ there was something he needed from this chapter, knew the shape of it, but he’d been staring at the same paragraph for an hour. 

Getting away sounded like a wonderful idea. Some air, some sky, something to eat, and he could try again with a clear head. A quick glance at both companions showed Beau still looking surprised but happy, and Jester dishevelled and grinning. 

Hooking her arm through Caleb’s too, Jester spun the three of them around and pointed to the door. 

“Tooooooo pastries!” She called happily, setting off a surrounding cascade of shushing from the various monks. Not chastened in the slightest she tugged Caleb and Beau behind her like sails as she bounced out the door. 

The humans exchanged wry grins in her wake. 

“I suppose we’re not going to the dining hall then,” Caleb called, not sure which of the women he was asking. 

“Jester doesn’t know where it is,” Beau added, hurrying to get her feet under her and catch up. 

“I know where the Pentamarket is,” Jester countered happily, “and where all the really good pastry stalls are!” 

About to argue that the Cobalt Soul’s dining hall was closer, Caleb deflated. 

Outside. 

Outside was good. Different walls, some space, some noise and people and a complete lack of scholarly hush sounded wonderful at the moment. He’d likely be in the dining halls for the last two days of his week anyway; a little variety wouldn’t hurt. 

As they passed through the large gate Caleb felt tension he hadn’t even known he was carrying slip away. Zadash wasn’t an especially colourful city, but after the muted tones of the library the muddy browns and greys felt vibrant and lively. 

Beau seemed to be following his lead since she hadn’t argued either, and now all three were walking abreast, still guided by a merry Jester to the Pentamarket. Which did raise a question. 

“What happened to your huge basket of breakfast pastries, Jester?” Caleb asked, trying to remember if he’d seen her grab it. But then, he’d lost track of her for several hours. 

The tiefling shrugged happily, not even glancing at him as she navigated the busy streets. 

“Oh, I put the rest in my haversack. I ate a couple more while you were reading but the rest should last a while!” 

Remembering some of the treats she’d taken out of the haversack, Beau and Caleb shared a more meaningful look. 

“We could stock up properly right before we leave, and then you can eat all these ones now?” Beau offered hopefully. Jester shrugged, brightened, and darted off, yanking Caleb behind her. 

“Maybe? Oh we have to go here! They have these little sort of pie pockets folded over!” 

Beau and Caleb stumbled across the street after her and pulled up short in front of a small stall. It smelled wonderful, especially after a few days of the plain, hearty food at the Cobalt Soul. The monks were generous and ate well, but didn’t lean too much towards fine cuisine. 

Technically nor did the stall, but it smelled of rich gravy and spices. Jester was already chatting delightedly with the owner about what he was selling, what kinds he had, and what was the weirdest thing he’d ever swallowed for less than five gold. The elf seemed rather taken aback by the latter but was happy enough to sell them three pasties for a silver. 

And a whispered tale from Jester about the size of a bug she’d once seen Fjord swallow in his sleep. 

It was hard to tell if she was kidding. 

It weighed on Caleb’s mind as they wandered through the streets, hot pasties in hand. 

“Jester... would you tell me if you saw a bug crawl in my mouth while I was sleeping?” He asked eventually, frowning into his pasty. 

Beau must have been considering the same thing because she nodded immediately, frowning across at the tiefling. 

“Like, you’d wake me up or swat it away, right?” She asked warily. 

Jester frowned at the pair of them, mildly confused. 

“Well I’m not gonna slap you in the face while you’re sleeping, that would be rude?” She said slowly. 

Caleb pulled a face. Beau gagged. 

“Jester,” Caleb said firmly, making sure he had her attention before continuing, “I would very much like you to stop bugs crawling in my mouth when I am sleeping. Even if it wakes me up.” 

Beau nodded emphatically, taking a large bite from her pasty. 

“Same.” 

Jester looked between them for a moment and shrugged. 

“Okay, I can do that. Should I tell Fjord?” 

The humans exchanged a speaking look. 

“Probably best not,” Beau decided after a long moment. Caleb shrugged, doing his level best to keep a straight face. 

“It will just upset him.” 

Something was clearly on Jester’s mind. 

“Do you think that’s why he swallowed his sword? To kill the bug?” 

This time both humans stared at her in unison. It... no. It couldn’t be related? Probably? Utterly lost, Beau shrugged and both women turned to Caleb. Expectantly, like he had the first clue about warlock pacts. 

“Is it a magic thing?” Jester asked hopefully. Fighting a smile, Caleb shrugged as well. 

“Fjord’s magic is more like yours than mine, Jester. I have never swallowed anything as part of a spell.” A technical distinction that pulled a grin to his face. Pulled a broad, filthy grin across Jester’s too. 

“Not as part of a spelllllll,” she agreed, stifling a giggle. Beau rolled her eyes, trying to pretend she wasn’t also fighting a grin, stuffing the last of her pasty into her mouth. 

“Magic is bullshit,” the monk sighed melodramatically. Jester burst into giggles and nudged Caleb, who nudged back with a chuckle of his own. 

They were wandering back in the direction of the library, which was enough to settle the nagging part of his mind that insisted he could still be sat at a table, staring futilely into a book. He’d get more done for having the break, Beau had proved it yesterday. 

Already he was feeling less stressed, a tension headache that hadn’t quite broken easing away. It was so... nice to get out for a little bit and think about anything but the dead ends in his studies. Familiar excitement bubbled in his chest as they turned back into view of the library, the thrill of so many books rising back over his old frustrations. 

Nothing could dampen his enthusiasm for long when it came to reading. Not even two days worth of exhaustion, apparently. 

Beau hesitated a moment at the doors to the library, looking between them almost reluctantly. she had her own training to get back to, they’d both seen the bruises, and Jester had already dropped a healing spell on her. 

Caleb wasn’t completely sure if she looked reluctant to leave them or wary of leaving Jester unattended. Finally she shrugged, giving Jester a nudge and nodding to Caleb. 

“Take care of him, yeah?” She asked, paused again. Frowned at Caleb. “Do you wanna take another break for dinner or what?” 

It already sounded like a bad idea, wasting his research time when he was now so refreshed and ready. Caleb hesitated a moment and shrugged. 

“It will depend on how this afternoon goes I think. If I am doing well I would prefer to make it quick,” he explained and Jester nodded brightly. 

“I’ll come bother you and ask what you want to do in a couple more hours,” she agreed happily. Beau looked more torn than ever. 

“Just... don’t get into too much trouble, okay?” She eventually asked with a sigh. Jester beamed bright enough to almost sparkle. 

“I won’t! I’m not going to get Caleb in ~any~ trouble.” 

Fighting the urge to laugh, Caleb patted Beau on the shoulder. 

“Thank you for the break, Beauregard, and for the time in the library. Now go back to getting your butt kicked so I can read.” 

“Hey!” It was hard to tell if Beau was feigning hurt or offence as the monk huffed, flexing her muscles. “I’ll have you know I’m the one doing the butt _kicking_ ,” she declared archly, punching Caleb in the shoulder. Now Caleb didn’t bother fighting his grin. 

“Then go and kick some butt and you can tell Jester all about it at dinner.” 

“You can tell both of us about it,” Jester cut in cheerfully, linking arms with Caleb and tugging him into the library, waving an exuberant goodbye. 

Caleb considered protesting, but overall it didn’t seem worth it. He was beginning to understand the distinction from where “I have limited time to read” bled into “I have limited time and am getting nowhere so I will punish myself by staring at this page until I get a migraine”. He’d always had trouble with obsession even before deciding he deserved to suffer. 

Another night’s sleep had helped, he could tell he was thinking more clearly than the day before. It would have been infuriating if Beau had noticed or made any comment. But the monk just waved them off with a pointed hiss to Jester. 

“No more climbing!” 

Jester blew a raspberry back and grinned at Caleb. 

“Like I need to repeat a trick.” 

** 

Just like the morning, the afternoon began quite well. Jester accompanied him back to his table, good as gold, and even found a book of her own to flick through. 

And another one. 

And another one. 

And another one. 

By the fourth in fifteen minutes, Caleb knew she was flagging, but he’d finally made a breakthrough of his own. There was something in the fundamental sigils of a transmutation glyph that related to the permanence of the spell; the same sequences repeated across hourly, minuted, or instant spells. 

If he thought back, he was pretty sure he could remember being taught something similar in the academy. Something about the complexity of needed parts and amount of power expended that would relate to duration. 

To make something fully permanent... that would take some very complex preparations. Utterly relieved to have moved from reading and rereading the work of others, Caleb cleared the table and grabbed some basic guides to glyphs and components. 

Jester was more than happy to help haul away stacks of books, but he did specify that she give them to a monk rather than reshelving herself. Promising that she would, she disappeared with a double armload that Caleb would have taken three trips with... and probably significantly more care. 

Pulling over an encyclopedia, Caleb pulled out his research book and set to work. 

Calculations scrawled away under his fingers, filling page after page as he checked facts, dived into common substitutions, and began compiling a list. If he was to make a new spell, he would be working from the ground up; never mind the work of others, he would start from the basics. 

Somewhere in his pile he found a slim, undistinguished volume. A monk’s treatise theorizing about why certain spell components had their particular properties. 

It was better than gold, and Caleb briefly considered asking Nott to come back and steal it for him. The book was mostly theoretical, with references to a thousand other volumes that Caleb dismissed out of hand. But it felt right. 

It felt true. Her work made perfect sense to Caleb, gelled with how the magic felt under his fingers, and he had to wonder if she’d had her own experience with wizardry. If she’d felt the call of magic in her blood, needing just the right keys to unlock it. 

The section on Polymorph was barely a paragraph, but it sent Caleb spinning down an entirely new path. The cocoon was vital as an agent of change, the living essence of transformation from one thing to another, but a butterfly was a short lived creature. They rarely lived even a year - the transformation may have been permanent for the caterpillar, but hardly lasted. 

He would need something changeable, yet lasting. Durable, that would hold its new shape. 

Hours flew past as Caleb dived back into his manuals, lists of known components and their properties flying under his fingers. 

Jester watched him for a little while, doing her best to keep up as he scrawled his notes, snatching up a book to rifle through it and tossing it aside. It was a lot more animated than he’d been in the morning, mostly just sat staring and turning pages faster than she’d believe. 

A few times he would ask her to find him another book, a longer list, or a spin off. Often without even looking up from his work. 

She did her best, but Jester had never been in a library before. By the time she explained what she needed to the monks, half the time Caleb had already gone and found it himself. Hoping to be helpful, she got him some more ink instead, and pretty much tried to keep out of the way. 

It was very impressive just to watch. The sudden intensity in every line of Caleb’s body, his focus razor sharp as he devoured the books before him, hand almost blurred as he wrote notes and calculations faster than she could follow. 

There was no doubt his research was going a lot better now, and for a while she was entranced just to watch. He looked so... smart. Worldly, efficient, precise, pretty much all of the things Jester knew full well that she wasn’t. Things she didn’t particularly want for herself, but... well... 

It was fucking hot. 

Just the thought of that intensity turned on her made her tail curl happily, a little wriggle down her spine. Maybe they could play student and professor later. Jester was an excellent student when she actually cared, the Traveler had always told her so, and so had her art teachers. 

Her music teachers hadn’t been convinced, but in Jester’s mind that just proved that their subjects were boring. 

After a little while she pulled out her sketchbook and stole an ink pot for herself, sneaking glances at Caleb and trying to draw him while he worked. It was a fun challenge as he moved so quickly, but often into similar positions and patterns. 

He’d pour over the book, brows furrowed and intense. Push it away, bend over his own pages of scrawled notes. Switch to a scrap paper and scribble equations. Back to the notes, back to the book, always so very focused. 

She filled a couple of pages easily, trying to capture just how his beard moved when he was frowning, just the right light in his eyes as he read. It was kinda fun racing against Caleb’s furious pace, abandoning each sketch as he shifted position and moving on to the next one. 

They whiled away hours together without speaking, each bent to their respective work. 

There was something burning in Caleb now that he’d begun to make some actual progress; something that Jester couldn’t help trying to capture. It kept both busy enough that Beau managed to surprise the pair of them when she came back for dinner. 

The monk entered the library suspiciously, her gaze sweeping the ceiling before she took her first step in. Approaching quickly, she gave Caleb’s shoulder a cursory shake, glancing across the table at Jester and clearly assuming she was a duplicate, still looking around in case of tiefling attacks. 

“Hey. You wanted to eat in the hall today?” She asked brusquely, double taking as Jester jumped, looked up, and grinned at her. 

“Oh! Hey Beau! Is it supper time already?” 

As startled as Jester, Caleb hesitated a moment, staring at his half filled page of calculations. 

Alright. This definitely wasn’t something he could leave Frumpkin with and let his body be elsewhere. But... 

“Let me finish this thought,” he said without looking up, scribbling furiously across his scrap paper. He just knew that if he left off in the middle of something it would all look like gibberish by the time he came back. 

No, better to hurry and get to the end, where he could pick up his train of thought neatly. 

Jester and Beau exchanged glances and shrugged, Beau coming to lean against the table and peer at Jester’s sketchbook. 

“So what were you doin’ that had you so engrossed?” She asked, cocking her head to see the page. Jester turned the book immediately for her to see. 

“I was speed sketching Caleb! He moves around a lot so it was kinda hard, but really good practice and a lot of fun. I want to get better at like, people and expressions and things, so this was really good!” She grinned across at the wizard to find him completely oblivious, rushing through the last line of his calculations. 

Pushing back from the table, Caleb sucked in a sigh. This spell was going to cost at least a thousand gold, whatever spell components he ended up using. It would be... well, now that he thought about the kind of money they were making as a group, it wouldn’t be impossible. 

But his time spell could be hundreds of thousands quite easily. He couldn’t imagine any kind of time magic coming cheaply; if such a thing were possible, it simply would be everywhere. There were too many potential uses for time magic. 

Casting the thought aside until he had literally anything to go on, Caleb gave a smile to his companions. 

“The dining hall, yes?” He asked, glancing between the pair of them. Beau was grinning at him though he couldn’t imagine why. 

Jester bounced over as he rose, offering her arm and a broad grin. 

“Yeah! And if they don’t want us there, we can go get something outside!” 

Rolling her eyes, Beau took Caleb’s other arm, pretty much out of habit at this point. 

“They’re not gonna mind, you’re not gonna eat more than the whole hall. It’s just not gonna be anything fancy,” she explained with a semi patient sigh. If he thought hard, Caleb could vaguely remember her offering something similar when they’d first arrived. 

He’d never bothered to look into it. 

** 

The Cobalt Soul’s dining hall wasn’t quite large enough to seat every monk in residence, but it was more than large enough for the hundred or so people still there when the members of the Nein arrived. It was rather like the dining halls Caleb could dimly remember from his first days at the Soltryce Academy. 

It was blatantly obvious that Jester had never seen anything like it in her life. 

She cooed over the size of the hall, and the long wall of tables and heated dishes of food. It wasn’t exactly varied but there were cooks around to serve hearty stew and bread. More choices than Caleb had expected if he was honest. 

Jester bounced through the whole thing like it was a delightful dream, beaming and chatting eagerly to anyone who came near her. Beau was clearly a familiar face, and just as clearly a notorious one. 

Younger monks scuttled close together as they approached one of the long tables, giving them space. If Beau noticed at all she didn’t comment beyond a satisfied grunt. Now that, Caleb found endearing, and he settled into place with a grin. 

True to her word, Beau entertained them with tales of her training as they ate. Apparently a lot of it was rather repetitive but her current master, while not Dairon, had her trying some pretty cool new tricks. 

“He wants me reading shit too,” the monk grumbled, prodding her spoon in Caleb’s direction, “so I’ll be in the library with you an’ Fjord tomorrow, so none of your flirting.” 

Caleb’s cheeks flushed red and he opened his mouth to deny ~any~ flirting, let alone in the library, but Jester intervened before he had the chance. 

“No quickies under the table either,” the tiefling giggled, shooting Caleb a sly grin that made his blush burn hotter. 

He even felt like a teenager again as he stared into his bowl to avoid their eyes.

“I am not going to fuck anyone in the library,” he promised in a hiss, to Beau’s great relief. 

Right up until Jester snickered, light and merriment suddenly replaced by lascivious intent. 

“Molly’s coming by for the end of the week,” she called in a singsong voice and Caleb felt like his face might combust. 

If anyone was going to push fucking in the library... frankly it was a surprise that it hadn’t been Jester, but failing that Molly was the most likely candidate. Beau groaned and sprawled across the table, burying her face in her arms. 

“Not while I’m there too,” she whined, tilting just enough to crack an eye open in Caleb’s general direction. 

Lost in thoughts of prehensile tails and hot lavender hands, Caleb coughed hurriedly and tried to shake himself back to earth. Managed to give Beau a curt nod while Jester snickered. 

“Maybe I’ll come by after dinner,” she mused slyly, batting her lashes at Caleb, “I could use more sketch practice.” 

The reference flew right over the wizard’s head, as he’d been too immersed in his own work to pay any mind to what Jester had done all afternoon. It didn’t much matter as he groaned, shifting on the bench and stuffing his mouth with soup. 

Reminding himself that he was a grown ass adult, a man now, not a blushing boy, did absolutely nothing to convince his heated cheeks. He couldn’t blame them. A pair of mischievous tieflings was more than any circulatory system could be expected to handle. 

It kept Jester happy, and the rest of the meal passed reasonably well. Caleb mostly stayed quiet and listened to his companions talk, occasionally putting in his own thoughts as they chatted about anything from their other companions to their plans in Zadash. 

Jester was mostly closeted about what her own plans for their down time had been, though she admitted with a coy smile that they miiiight just notice what she’d been up to if they left the library. 

Mayhem then. Not surprising. 

Caleb could see the curiosity itching in the back of Beau’s mind as Jester cheerfully changed the subject to how Caleb’s own research had been going. 

“I assume you were doing good,” she teased with a grin, watching Caleb finish the last of his soup and already starting to rise, “cuz you didn’t look like you wanted to throw anything at all! He nearly threw like, three books this morning,” she added to Beau in a stage whisper, eyes sparkling with mischief. 

The wizard hesitated a moment, glancing down at his tray. He wasn’t aware that his frustration had been that obvious, but... he gave Jester a quick smile and a nod. 

“It is going well now. I believe I may be onto something. So if you do not need me...” 

Snorting a laugh, Beau waved him away, dunking bread into the dregs of her soup. 

“Yeah, get back to your books. Jessie knows where to find you,” she shot Jester a look and the tiefling nodded happily. 

“At the big table with all the mess!” She agreed brightly. Caleb had just enough self respect left to flush a little as he collected his tray. 

Looked around for where to return it. Stalled out a little. 

And was caught by the elbow and turned back towards the food tables. 

“On the end, there’s a bucket,” Beau directed with a quick nod as he glanced down at her. 

Caleb couldn’t see the bucket, but he was willing to take her word for it as he hurried across. If nothing else, one of the monks serving food would be able to tell him where to go. 

It turned out that the bucket was just behind the service tables, and Caleb quickly dropped off his dishes, hurrying back to the library. Today had been... fun, he decided, pulling his notes back towards himself and grabbing a pen. 

He was sure he was thinking more clearly than he had done all week, and he could remember his reading with more clarity. Almost back to his usual self. 

Part of him wondered if he should try rereading some of the books he’d skimmed through the past few days, but just the thought brought a flare of resentment. He had limited time in the library, far too limited to tread the same ground twice. But if there had been something there, and he’d been too exhausted to see it... 

No, he decided harshly, pulling a compendium of minerals and their magical properties back towards him. No, there was no point retreading old ground and looking for answers hidden away in history. He was Caleb Widogast, and if a spell did not already exist for what he needed to do, he’d damn well create one. 

This was the most productive he’d felt in days, fully invigorated to have a problem before him that he could really wrestle with. He knew what he needed, and now he could see the general shape of a plan coming together. 

The calamity and age of arcanum were, at the moment, a dead end; even if the Cobalt Soul had more useful information about them, he didn’t have access to it yet. He was making progress now, and there was no use turning from that on the off chance he’d missed something. 

With any luck, this wouldn’t be his last trip to the archive. Starting with the more transformative sections of the compendium already narrowed his search, but he skimmed the whole thing anyway, just in case there was something more useful. Something for his work with time. 

He wasn’t particularly surprised to find nothing on that score, but it took him almost an hour to speed read through the heavy tome. By the time he looked up, Jester was back, happily doodling away in her sketchbook. With his life on the line he couldn’t have guessed when she’d come back. 

It was possible she’d made an extra effort not to disturb him. It was possible he’d been so caught up in his reading he wouldn’t have noticed a rhinoceros. 

Either way, it made him smile a little to see her, peaceful as could be in the library. The thought that he’d have Beau with him tomorrow made him snicker too. 

He genuinely couldn’t imagine the surly monk reading quietly. He could barely imagine her sitting quietly, even after days on the road. Then again, he’d never have imagined Jester sitting quietly either. 

Whatever calm had settled in her over the afternoon didn’t last the evening, however. She gave it a try, pulling out her sketchbook again, starting a few doodles, but it wasn’t the same. She was distracted now, thinking about Beau and her adventures, thinking about her own adventures. 

She didn’t have much of a plan for the next few days really. Just some down time and maybe a little more happy mayhem. Zadash had a couple of large shrines and temples, and she’d managed to find most of them. She could always spend the rest of the week scoping them out, making a plan, but... 

There really wasn’t going to be time for her to do anything big. 

And technically, the Cobalt Soul counted as a temple to the Archeart, or one of those knowledge gods. Caleb would make a good devotee to one of those gods; he was still working furiously, covering pages and pages in notes and calculations. 

In a way, it made Jester a little jealous. She didn’t really have anything that commanded her time, or her energy like that. Nothing but the Traveler anyway, and he didn’t really ask her to do much of anything right now. 

She got up a few times, fetched Caleb some more stacks of paper, another inkwell, but she was growing restless. Caleb didn’t notice, scrawling complex diagrams and reams of numbers and occasionally pulling a book towards him to devour. 

That kept Jester busy for a while, drawing a Caleb-monster crunching down whole book shelves while the monks screamed in horror. It turned into quite the little masterpiece, but then she was bored again. 

There was just... nothing to do but read, or sit and watch Caleb read. She’d had a good wander in the morning and explored most of the places she was allowed to go. It was all just shelves and books and more tables like this one, sometimes with a bunch of monks. 

Occasionally, Caleb would glance up from his book to check on her. Usually as he’d finished one, and was reaching for his notes or another book, he’d glance around. Find where she was, sometimes give her a nod. 

It was more automatic than anything else now, part of the process as he kept working through book after book. He was a little surprised how often she was just... sitting, either hunched over her sketchbook or staring into space. Probably plotting. 

A couple of times he didn’t spot her right away and had to pause, looking around properly to find her. Once she was under the table, playing with Frumpkin, and he almost jumped out of his skin when a cool hand suddenly grabbed his ankle. A few times she’d wander back into view with more paper for him and he’d give her a grateful smile and get right back to work. 

At some point she must have noticed, because... she kept setting up stranger and stranger tableaus. 

It started when he glanced up, maybe two hours after dinner, and caught her balancing her chair on one leg. Her tail stuck out like a rudder, arms flailing wildly, and it just knocked everything else from his head. He just stared at her, utterly dumbfounded, until she toppled over with a crash. 

A tide of shushing rose around them and Jester popped back up, unharmed and grinning and caught Caleb staring at her. That delighted grin spread ever wider and she righted her chair, sitting innocently once more. 

He’d forced himself back to work, rereading the last few paragraphs to get his train of thought back and she’d settled peacefully. Or so he’d thought. 

The next time he looked up, she’d built a tower from his unused books. Mostly unused; the one he needed next was about half way up, balanced carefully between two thinner volumes. 

She’d happily pulled it out when he asked, sending the top of the tower tumbling across the table, but this time a quick Thaumaturgy slammed the door open in time to cover the noise. Stifling a laugh, Caleb had taken his book and tried to get back to work. 

Next time, she’d gotten out her disguise kit and had given Frumpkin a flowing beard. 

The time after that, she’d folded sheets of paper into a little army of boats. 

It got to the point where he wanted to look up every twenty minutes or so, wanting to catch her out and see what she was doing. He knew he only had a few more hours if she held him to the same schedule Nott had, but he just... couldn’t help it. He was fascinated by her in the way he always was. 

Jester found fun wherever she went, and if she couldn’t find it she’d create it. He found himself smiling as he worked, found himself really enjoying the work itself as well as her merry interventions. This was... 

He could remember a time when magic was just fun. When he’d studied for the sheer joy of it, for the thrill of discovery, the chance to learn something new. When it wasn’t a burning need in his goal, tied to self loathing and rage. 

When it was enough to try something new for the sake of trying it, and discovery was its own thrill. This was the kind of thing he’d always loved. Exactly what he’d dreamed about, so long ago. 

Making a spell to help his friend. 

He could feel the joy settling into his chest as he worked, shifting the weight of years. Lighter than he’d felt in a lifetime. He had a library, he had friends, things he’d never thought to have again. 

The smile didn’t leave his face as the evening wore on into night, growing broader every time he glanced up and Jester was doing something else ridiculous. He had genuinely never known someone else like her; not before meeting Mollymauk at least. 

And now he’d met two happy troublemakers, and he couldn’t imagine life without them. Without any of the Mighty Nein. They were a set, all perfectly balanced to shore up each others’ weaknesses. 

Temperaments... were a little less balanced, but he had to admit they had a good array there as well. Jester, Molly, and Nott were always there with a joke or diversion if he and Beau came to odds, Fjord with a calming word when Molly wound Beau and Nott too tight. 

A wry grin tugged at his lips. 

He’d like to be able to say they tempered Jester down if she was getting into too much trouble, but it’d be a lie. It was just so easy to get sucked in. To watch her and egg her on and privately wonder if she was really, actually serious. 

In so many ways Jester was like a child, innocent, exuberant and full of life, and completely unrepentant. She knew what she wanted from the world and had absolutely no interest in letting boring things like other peoples’ opinions stop her. 

He would hate to see her lose that confidence. That sparkle. That gleam of delight and mischief he was sure had called a trickster god straight to her. 

Caleb wasn’t a man for faith, not in anything at all, but he wasn’t stupid enough to deny Jester’s. Her Traveler brought her such a pure, sparkling glee, and his gifts had saved all of their lives on the way to Zadash. 

Watching her... he could see the appeal of faith, if not want it for himself. 

It was actually in watching her that he realised it must be getting late, too. Seeing her yawn, her little projects slowing down to almost nothing as the night wore on. Part of him wondered if she would actually drag him away to bed, or if he could get up with staying up all night. 

He cut that thought off before it started. There was no point exhausting himself again when he was finally making progress. He’d lost almost three days already, and even if he pushed there was no way he could make it all the way through the next three. 

Perhaps tomorrow night he could wrangle an all-nighter out of Fjord or Mollymauk, and make a full use of his last 48 hours. His cheeks flushed just a little at the thoughts of the kinds of things they could do with an all-nighter. Fuck, the kinds of things they could do with a couple hours in bed. 

It might help him focus better and lose a little more tension. 

Either way, he forced himself to discard it for now. If he had to sleep, and he would at least for tonight, he may as well make sure that he did not oversleep in the morning. 

Jester was visibly surprised when he closed his book and didn’t reach for another one, startling from a half doze in her chair as he put his notes away. 

“Oh... Caleb, Beau said that I wasn’t kicking you out of the library for another hour?” She asked cautiously, pushing back her own chair. 

Caleb hesitated for a moment. 

Another hour... he could get through at least one book of magical amplifiers in an hour. 

But he firmed himself against the temptation. No matter what they seemed to think, he wasn’t a child; he knew what his body needed, and he could make his own choices. He gave her a smile instead, offering his hand to help her rise. 

“I have reached a good stopping place. It would be better to get up early tomorrow, when I can continue without interruption,” he told her softly. 

“Until lunch time,” Jester corrected cheerfully, strong fingers linking through his. Caleb wasn’t properly braced to fully take her weight, wouldn’t have bet money that he could even if he was, but he was able to steady her as she bounced upright. 

All of her sleepiness seemed to be gone, replaced with a sunshine bright smile that beamed with pride. She continued the bounce a step closer, pressing a kiss to his cheek. 

“Thank you for taking care of yourself, Caleb,” she said so gently that he had another stab of self loathing for making her doubt it. 

For making all of them doubt it. 

He’d fucked up badly enough for the whole Mighty Nein to be giving up their private time just to babysit him. Just to keep him from running himself straight back into the ground. 

The least he could do was cooperate. 

If he wanted to do a little more... he had absolutely no idea how he would repay Nott or Beauregard, but that would wait until he had something good. The others though, he could think of quite a few ways he could show his gratitude. 

He was going to blame his cleric for the decidedly libidinous turn his thoughts had taken. Not that she had to actually do anything to provoke it anymore. 

He’d not been taking care of any of his physical needs for several days. He was allowed to be a little pent up, and he had the feeling he’d have several willing volunteers to help “treat” that particular problem. 

Smiling again, he slipped his arm through Jester’s. 

“Will you come and put me to bed?” He asked, impressed with himself by how little innuendo he managed. 

Might as well not have bothered as Jester instantly filled it in anyway, grinning right back. 

“And tucking you in?” She teased, her tail slinking around his waist. 

His smile broadening just a little, Caleb gave her hand a pat. 

“At the end of the week. When I have... recovered enough to do you justice.” 

As expected Jester squeaked happily and cuddled in, discarding his arm to wrap hers around his chest instead. 

“Oh, I will have a lot of ideas of things we can do by then!” She declared happily, letting Caleb lead her from the library and around the corner to his nook. 

She did stay to tuck him in, though far more chastely than Caleb would have thought possible. Even her parting kiss was soft and sweet. Caleb watched her go through heavy lids, surprised himself at how fast sleep was taking him the second he laid down. 

He’d made the right decision, it seemed. He was still more exhausted than he’d thought. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HK: You know what? I’m proud of the boy in this one too. He’s making connections and being good. And will likely promptly-immediately sabotage it in the morning. He did absolutely have 2 points of exhaustion.

**Author's Note:**

> HK: This is actually gonna be a full thing because planning this fic got me through the end of the Avantika arc and I neeeeeeed to write soft fluffy nerd Fjord but I will not speak to speed >.>


End file.
